I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
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Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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