I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize