dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Randomize
