Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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