I'm really into asian looking animals
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
you would pick up someone in the library
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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