when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
where are you?
Hypothermia
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
