Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
