just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
