we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
