So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.