we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
