duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
i believe in u and ur pee
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
