He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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