thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Randomize
