office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
