Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
