Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
