I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
