Sry I called you an 8
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
