My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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