he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
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After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
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On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
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You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now