my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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