It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
