a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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