Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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