I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
