So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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