stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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