Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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