I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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