You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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