Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
