Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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