just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
