and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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