I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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