he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
