those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My dick has a subreddit
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
