oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
How naked do you want me to be?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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