Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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