I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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