So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
