I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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