all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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