this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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