I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
