Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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