You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
