using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
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