i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize