the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
