Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize
